Last Saturday evening we were at Dad Lapps. This is one place that we visited almost every single day since Dad Lapps returned home from Arizona. Austin would say every day, "Mommy Lapp???" We wanted to support Mom in caring for Dad as much as we could! It was Mike's turn to spend the night at Dad's. The siblings took turns sleeping overnight at Dads so that if Dad needed anything during the night, they could let Mom sleep and they would help Dad if necessary! I made some fresh hamburgers and we went to Dad's Saturday evening to grill and eat supper on the back porch. The sunset was gorgeous and Lena and I went up to Dad's home place to snap some pictures!!!
We kept checking on Dad while we ate supper on the back porch. One time Dad said, "See all those flowers out there and those people?" Mom started asking Dad questions and wanted to know more of what he was seeing. Was it heaven? What was he seeing? Just like that, his eyes closed and he was peacefully resting again. We will never know if he saw more of heaven.
Mike spent the night beside Dad's bedside. Dad had thrown up A LOT on Saturday and so every tiny move Dad made during the night, Mike was right there. Mike even jumped up once in his sleep and was dreaming that Dad needed help. Mike met the rest of us at church later that morning.
We stopped in later Sunday and Dad's throat sounded so raw. Throwing up so much the day before was taking a toll on him!!! His voice sounded much different and his words were very few. He was so weak.
The boys were wanting to go see the New Holland Car Show. I was much more leaning towards taking Sunday afternoon naps and relaxing ... but decided to have a fun afternoon out with the hubby and kids. It was so hot outside but walking around the park looking at oldies was a fun time!!! We were amazed at all the old cars and models!
That night, we all got refreshed and cleaned up at home and we had just fallen asleep when Mike's phone rang at 11 PM. It was his brother Ervin calling saying that we need to come over to Dad Lapp's. Dad was not well. We quickly jumped out of bed and told Hadassah what was happening and Mike and I were off to go to Dad's. Mike's siblings all gathered around Dad's bedside. We were up most of the night just watching Dad breathe and assisting him in any way we could!
Monday morning came and we were all still around Dad's bedside. Someone blessed us with breakfast sandwiches! We spent the day at Dad's. Being near to Dad. Being together as a family. Supper was brought to Dad's again for all of us. The children went to my sister Jody's house for the day. By late evening, we were all feeling very tired. We decided to stay at Dad's in shifts. We knew that we couldn't all stay up all night again. Mike and I decided to go home because Mike was with Dad on Saturday night and had interruptions during the night. We needed a good nights rest! Before we left, we said our good byes to Dad through tears. Mike told Dad that we were leaving for the night and thanked him for all he's done for us. He said, "Good night Dad. I love you." I said the same thing to Dad. We wiped tears as Dad turned his head towards us and said, "Night." And with his mouth moving so weak, he tried to say "I love you" back to us. We knew what he said! Then we hugged Mom good night and left to come home to sleep. The children stayed at Jody's overnight.
Tuesday morning we woke up feeling more energized. Both Mike and I slept good. We didn't waste time at home and headed right over to Dad Lapp's again. Breakfast was served again at Dad's. Aunt Lena made us eggs and stewed crackers. We again gathered around Dad. His breathing was different and harder. Hospice came out and checked on Dad. We were moistening Dad's lips with a sponge. His eyes were partly open with a glaze gloss over them. We know that Dad could still hear us because when we asked if he wanted more water on his lips, he would move his eye brow or twig. He only said a few words on Tuesday. Dad's passing seemed so close.
Mike had a few things he did on Tuesday. It was hard for some of us to sit right beside Dad and watch all of this. Jody brought the children over to see Dad but Ashlyn didn't want to touch Dad's hand. She just looked and looked. Dad didn't really look like himself because of his eyes partly open and breathing was harder. Hadassah told Dad that she loved him and that she will take his place in playing Settlers. Matthew said he loved him too as tears rolled down his cheeks. This is really hard for him to see Daudy like this! Austin also looked at Dad but wanted to rather go play with Mom's pink baseball that he always got when we went to Dad's home. The children left again with Jody.
Tuesday night, supper was provided by our church friends. Taco Salad and fresh fruit and donuts was such a blessing!!! Thank you so much Sonia and Lena! Mike had a church building committee meeting Tuesday evening that he decided to go to. I finally texted him and said that we were timing Dad's breathing. It was about every seven seconds he would take another breathe. Mike came right away and we again all sat beside Dad's bed. Mike and I stayed at Dad's overnight again along with other siblings. Dad's night was long and we tried to keep our eyes open when it was our turn to sit beside him. Would Dad see another day?
Wednesday morning came with a beautiful sunrise! I sat up beside Dad and felt his feet. His toes felt chilled but his ankles were still warm. Sister Lena was sitting beside Dad and I said that I'm going to go comb my hair but first we timed Dad's breathing. It went 17 seconds before another breath! How long would this last? I went downstairs to brush my teeth and comb my hair but was it wasn't long before Mike's Aunt Lena came running downstairs and said to come quickly! I ran up the steps taking two steps at a time and when I got to Dad's bedside, he had just taken his last breathe. It was 7:10 AM. He had a gargle and threw up and died. Mom Lapp was cleaning Dad up one last time. He washed Dad's beard so many times last Saturday from all his throwing up and now she did it once more. An eagle swooped right outside of Dad's sun porch window that morning. Those of us that were there for the night, all gathered around Dad! We cried and stroked Dad's hair and touched his hands while he was still warm. All of the siblings were called and they came as soon as they could! Many tears were shed. Some songs were sung and breakfast arrived at Moms. Again, church friends provided a yummy casserole for the family!!! Thank you Verna and Suz for blessing us!
The undertaker came and Dad's obituary was written. It was soon time to sit around Mom's kitchen table to make funeral arrangements. So much was happening all at once!!! The children were still with Jody. We missed them but knew they were better off with her! Plans were for my sisters and mom to go to French Creek Pool for the day and because of Dad Lapp's passing, that meant they went without me. I was so grateful that the children had a fun event planned for them that day! They were all doing so well through this tough journey but Mike and I knew that they wanted our family life back to 'normal' ASAP! Ginger went to Sadie's house. Mike and I came home to shower and got dressed for the first viewing night. Mike flopped on our bed when we came home and we cried and tried to process all what was happening! We were drained emotionally and physically we were tired. But God gave us strength and we were blessed by so many that came out to Dad Lapp's viewing!
It was hot!!! There were a few fans blowing but it didn't stop us from sweating and getting so warm in Mom's house! Jody brought the children for about an hour for them to view Dad and be with us. It was good to have them there but we were ready for Austin and Ashlyn to leave again. They were so warm and whiny! The viewing lasted till 9 PM. Mike's siblings all gathered around Dad's coffin and we prayed with Mom before heading home for some much needed sleep. We picked the children up at Tony's and we all slept at home!!! The children all needed this time together!
Thursday, Hadassah and Jess went with the children up to Jody's so she could take Ryan for his license. He passed!!! Hadassah and Ashlyn went to Jenna and Mariana's house in the afternoon to hang out with Hunter and Adrian. Matthew was with Benson at the pool!!! Thank you Lorene for inviting Matthew! Meanwhile, Mike and I went to Mom's again for another day of viewing! Thank you all for your support, comforting words, cares and flowers and food and cards, etc.!!! There were many people that traveled from near and far to come see Dad and encourage the family! Mom's church people did a tremendous job at feeding us through these days and working so much to make a funeral in Mom's home run smoothly! Family again gathered around Dad and we sang a song before heading home for more rest.
Friday was a mixed emotional day!!! We woke up singing happy birthday to Matthew! Matthew turned 12 on Dad Lapp's funeral day. He requested pancakes with peanut butter and syrup. So I honored that request! Then we all got dressed in our very best and headed for Dad Lapp's funeral service. To be there by 8-8:30 was a stretch but we made it! It was another warm, hot day! There was a small family funeral service at 9 AM in Mom's sun porch. Then at 10, we all went out to Dad's shop for his large funeral. The ministers did a wonderful job preaching and telling others that heaven is only for those who believe in Jesus! It's an eternal destination for all who believe in Jesus Christ!!! One day we will all bow down and worship Jesus and confess Him Lord and Saviour!!! The minister said, "Eternity is too long to be wrong."
After the service, we all went to Dad's burial site. Ashlyn rode along with John Ervin and Anna Ruth to the graveyard. Ashlyn and Sophia stood beside Mom Lapp while we viewed Dad one last time here on earth. They both cried and cried. When Dad was lowered into his grave and the paw bearers shoveled dirt into the grave, one the children said, "I'm going to miss Daudy." "Me too!" "Me three!!!" These children were trying to process all this sorrow. There was a thunderstorm brewing and we needed to finish up the service. We got into the Yukon and it started to rain. It poured as we drove back to Mom Lapp's for one more meal. The Amish Church folks did such a good job at serving us! We are so blessed! Thank you all!!!
We all sat together in Mom's basement to eat. Aunt Carol had stopped to pick up a whoopee pie cake for Matthew and we all sang happy birthday to him!!! Again, how thoughtful! Then we went up to the sun porch and chilled out together with Mike's siblings. So much has happened the past few days and we were exhausted! Hunter said to Ashlyn, "Daudy died now so we may loud again!" They got the toys out and played and ran around and let the stress release! :)
We sat together for a few more hours before cleaning up some and head back home. Austin was with Jody again. He only stayed for the short morning service and Jody picked him up before the main funeral service began. Mike went to pick up Austin and he did so well again for her!!! Thank YOU, THANK you Jody, Tony and family for caring and loving our children this week!!! I have no idea how we would have survived this week without your help!!!
When I walked into our house on Friday night I said, "OK, who was here???" The house was cleaned! The laundry was done and folded! There were now four bouquets in our kitchen. We received two fruit arrangements. There was a birthday cake on the counter for Matthew! It was all so overwhelming!!! THANK YOU!!! (Jody and Fannie Lynn cleaned my house!!!) I made the comment that there is something like being tired and then there is something like being exhausted!!! My muscles were hurting and I was so ready for the hot shower and to lie down! But because it was Matthew's birthday, we ordered pizza and watched a movie yet with him!!! My parents stopped in for a few minutes too. Sleep felt so good that night!!!
Dressed in our best for Daudy Lapp's funeral service: July 14, 2017
The cake Aunt Carol brought for Matthew!! Happy Birthday Matthew!!!
Huge flower arrangements!
This was the Sunday afternoon that we went to New Holland Car Show. We had no idea what our week ahead of us was all going to bring!
Wednesday morning there was a gorgeous sunrise. I was sitting right beside Dad's bedside when I took this picture.
Grave site.
Our final goodbye here on earth!
Blessings from friends!
Saturday, Mike and Hadassah went to Quakertown to try to pick up the work load that piled up from the past week. The rest of us went to Mom's to help clean up her house and property. The guys mowed the meadow. We cleaned up the house and Steve and Landon cleaned out Dad's barn! Working together is huge with such a large project!!!
Then the kids and I came home to mow our yard and work outside. The garden was needing my attention and zucchini were ready to be picked. My Mom brought up their mower and helped me work!!! Thanks a lot Mom!!!
When Mike and Hadassah came home, we all went over to Mom Lapp again for the evening. Telling stories of Dad and crying together is a great way to start our healing process of sorrow!
It's hard to know how to really get started here now this week. My mind keeps saying "last week this time." It does feel good to be back home and have the children around me. Mike is back to work. Our house looks like a floweriest shop! Please keep the Lapp Family in your prayers as we now turn another page and enter a new chapter in life. Grieving will be a process and we will never, ever forget Dad Lapp. His legacy lives on. We know and will try our best to be there now for Mom Lapp!!! Thank you again for all your kindness and prayers!!!
